"To my love's bed, to keep her warm, I'll carry wrapped and heated stones. That which is comfort to the flesh is sometimes torture to the bones." - Alden Nowlan

 

bicatperson:

GO TO YOUR SNAKE PIT by ErinPtah

(Transcript at the source.)

Ever since it was first hinted that Cecil has a sister, I feel like all the fanon has been that she’s older that he is, and has a tough, sensible caretaker sort of vibe. When all I want from this is endless Lilo & Stitch riffs.

Teenage Cecil has just been promoted from unpaid intern to Voice of Night Vale. Between that and the inheritance now that his mother has been ruled “municipally most-likely-dead”, he’s doing pretty well financially.

But he’s also been left the legal guardian of his seven-year-old sister. And trying to take care of her — while holding down a full-time job, all without dropping out of high school — is stressful, to say the least. Both siblings’ tempers are starting to fray.

Maybe they should get a dog.

_____

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silverleviathan:

What really REALLY pisses me off though is the fact that, on ever fricken test I take, I alway get Hufflepuff but then I relate to Slytherin just as much as I do Hufflepuff. Like yo, I’ll die for you and I’ll kill somebody for you. I’ll help you find your wallet and steal it too. I’ll open a door for you and then close it for the chick behind me. I’ll go stab somebody in the back and then buy them flowers after I drive them to the hospital.

lemonkittysquares:

"Hey dad…"
"Yeah Janice?"
"You know, you have tendency to stare at the crazy intricate connection between the government and the real governments that’s actually controlling the government but miss the big obvious stuff.  But that’s okay that’s what I’m here for."
"…"
"I’ll never hate you dad."
"…Thanks honey"
Cause just as Steve loves Janice and accepts her just the way she is. She learned from him to love and accept people exactly the way they are.  At least that’s what I think cause shhh shhh Steve nooo Janice will never hate you you’re such an amazing dad OH GAWD WHEN HE SAID THAT I JUST WANTED TO CRY.  

lemonkittysquares:

"Hey dad…"

"Yeah Janice?"

"You know, you have tendency to stare at the crazy intricate connection between the government and the real governments that’s actually controlling the government but miss the big obvious stuff.  But that’s okay that’s what I’m here for."

"…"

"I’ll never hate you dad."

"…Thanks honey"

Cause just as Steve loves Janice and accepts her just the way she is. She learned from him to love and accept people exactly the way they are.  At least that’s what I think cause shhh shhh Steve nooo Janice will never hate you you’re such an amazing dad OH GAWD WHEN HE SAID THAT I JUST WANTED TO CRY.  

romankyaryday:

i went to a new school when i started second grade and i still remember what my parents said to me as they dropped me off on my first day at the new school: “dont do your yoshi impression, it’s weird and you’ll make no friends.”

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

i romantically stand outside your window and hold up my iPhone to blast our song. a 30 second ad plays first

ceruleancynic:

mazarinedrake:

doctorflowers:

itsvondell:

itsvondell:

laurakvstheworld:

yepperoni:

i think about the 3d printed spider robot dancing to salsa a lot and im not sure if it’s because of the music or if it’s because of the hypnotizing dance moves
most likely both 

this is the best thing ive ever seen in my whole life

oh my god…. i was feeling down and this absolutely 100% lifted me out of it. oh my god!!!! i love him!!!!!

I forgot about salsa robot spider!!! truly a gift from on high

this seems like it would be comic relief in some horror video game or smt

I HAD NO IDEA HOW EMPTY MY LIFE WAS WITHOUT THIS VIDEO

oh my god this made me smile so hard, thank you spiderbot :3

(Source: yepperoni)